Sunday, November 14, 2004

nose job

seems much of my time is spent searching for air conditioned splendor. it's SO hot here, many days over 100, today we get a cool spell of 95. yesterday was the cool afternoon at india's first multiplex the inox to see veer-zaara, the new SRK movie. i was skeptical being fond of the art deco movie houses here, but it proved to be quite posh. reclining chairs, head rest, cup holder, and more leg room than an airline. i was one happy westerner. the movie was the typical romeo and juliet theme (paki loves hindustan) and SRK gets thrown in paki prison for 10 years for falling in love with another man's woman with all the right connections. the best part being the unexpected cameo by amitabh and hema malini as his parents-god he knows how to steal the show. the snack counter was very modern, offerring soft pista ice cream, cold coffee, samosa, and "dum maro dum" biriyani.(the famous song from hari krishna hari ram) the movie had the "throw me a bone with a happy ending" hollywood ending, which i like once in awhile.

this morning, an unexpected treat while having what we thought would only be coffee and air conditioning at the taj, when suddenly out of nowhere appears a monsterous buffet with a bottemless champagne glass. this thing had every fish imaginable, mutton tandoori, parsi faves, unlimited shrimps, subway sandwiches, crepe bar, pasta bar, and 20 feet of deserts, including mousse and swiss chocolates all for rps600. not only that, but a 3 piece malaysian band strolling to each table, taking requests. when they got to our table, we requested johnny cash, "folsom prison blues," cause we wanted to hear them sing the phrase, "i shot a man in reno just to watch him die," but they asked us for the lyrics, which we did not have on us, so we settled for hank williams, "your cheatin heart" instead, which was FAR better than hearing "annie's song" for the 15th time (god they love that john denver), horrific cat stevens covers (father and son!!!)ack!!, "lady in red" (i've heard this one in every third world country i've ever been to), and "up up and away in my beautiful balloon." even a 12 foot tall popeye appeared out of nowhere-or was that the champagne?

*fact-there are no rickshaws in bombay
*fact-it's hotter here cause we're at sea level. the water does not make it cooler.

*excerpt from "debonaire", a feminist nudie mag:
"I experience trememdous sexual pleasure whenever I come across a lady with a beautiful shapely nose with large flared nostrils. fortunately my wife posesses a sharp beautiful nose with large chiseled nostrils. I love to spend hours with my head in her lap gazing into her fleshy flexible oval shaped dark nasal pits, trembling with desire...
*excerpt from "the hindu" hyderabad
"a 21 year old died instantly when a piece of sharp iron pierced his throat on diwali friday. he was watching some locals celebrate with "crackers". one of them placed an empty iron box on a cracker and lit it. as the cracker exploded, the iron box broke into pieces and the splints flew across and one of them pierced Chand's throat killing him instantly."
...see..diwali IS dangerous.
OFF TO AURANGABAD...keep in touch and i will write with more upon my landing.

1 comment:

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